How to Squeeze a Hamster

-How to Squeeze a Hamster-
First run on down to the pet store and get yourself a sack of hamsters (get a few in case you mess up)
-Once you have your hamsters go to your basement (if you don’t have a basement try a closet or your most interior room)-
-Place one Hamster in your palm with its head between your thumb and index finger.-
-Close Hand.-
*If done correctly your hamster will be squeezed.*

If your hamster isn’t properly squeezed put him down and take a new one from the bag and try again.(a hamster that is not squeezed properly the first time can never be used again for this purpose, give them a good home) BE SURE NOT TO SQUEEZE THE HAMSTER TOO TIGHT, if you squeeze the hamster too tight you will hurt or kill them and break a few laws at the same time. That and hamster paste is hard to wash off as it stains.


Once your hamster is squeezed properly it will know it is loved, always.
Remember hamsters are pets and should be treated as pets not toys. Squeezing your hamster is a sign of affection not a cruel game.

This article brought to you by HamsterSqueezer.

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